the hunger with which i approach the page

i have believed in writing for a long time mostly because my internal temperature can only be relieved by putting words on paper; of course today everyone is talking writing speaking posting sharing slashing their insides open and letting it bleed onto the internet under their umbrella of Linktree and personal brand and longs to be a paid creator with thousands or hundreds or a dozen true fans which give enough money to live in a pleasant little metropolis and you can go to the gym and eat salads and have friends and not feel bad about not making money but America doesn’t want you to be happy or maybe just republicans Yes there there’s the enemy the bad guy we have to slay and overcome or recruit to the world of kindness yes they are bad computers poorly educated whipped and beaten and shellacked as children who know insist on life being pain and suffering for young people brown people gay people anyone not white who doesn’t wear nice clothes and fit into corporate piles of wealth and obedience and yes-men Yes master let me stay on my career path these rails to safety oh God don’t let me be a train car flying off the road becoming a chariot flying toward the sun like the original starburst I really am, don’t let them see my true internal voice and originality, I would not be safe if I committed to doing the art I used to do, I don’t believe in myself and don’t want to; I don’t want to look at myself—I would rather be superior, safe, employed with my Lexus vehicle parked in the garage as I eat my familiar snack and enforce the rules holding me above everybody by being logged onto email all day and enforcing the hegemony and hierarchy that excludes visionaries with new ideas because they’re dangerous, because people’s mediocrity and inessentialness might be revealed; it might be seen or considered that You Don’t Deserve Your Status and downward mobility might be for you, ask your doctor if loss of status and comfort and convenience might be best for the planet and for young people, ask your doctor if your time should be up



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Geoffrey Lewis

filling the blinking cursor with whatever comes up, letting the leviathan lead me to glory, singing popular music covers on video on Smule too, speaker, rambler